I love my kids...I love my kids...I love my kids...
Reserve and being a dad
Right now I am sitting reserve, which means that I'm still on the team but I am riding the bench until a spot opens up where I can have a regular flying schedule. Until, then, I either sit at home or at the airport and I get to fly when something opens up. Having kids and sitting reserve during summer is rough. If I am honest, there are many things that are a lot worse and I can't even really consider this a problem. However, I don't know how people do it when their kids are out of school for the summer.
I have 3 boys. All of them are middle school age and younger. Today, I was in Target with them and they were going INSANE. Yelling, running up and down the aisles, pushing each other in to the shelves, and knocking stuff over. Despite me trying to stop them, it didn't end. At the end of the trip, I was at the register and my oldest took my middle to the bathroom. They disappeared for what seemed like too long and 95% of me felt a slight degree of panic. 5% was happy and even a little excited I had a little longer break from them. Not my proudest moment, but it is what it is.
Here is a transcript of 5 minutes of every day that repeats itself over and over in different ways:
#1: What breed of dog do you like the most?
Me: Great Dane. That's why we have one.
#1: If you could own any type of dog what would it be?
Me: Great Dane
#1: What about a pug?
Me: A Great Dane
#1: What about those skinny dogs that run?
Me: A Greyhound?
Him: I think so
Me: A Great Dane
#1: Do parrots have testicles?
Me: I don't know. I'm pretty sure they must.
Now #2 joins the orchestra of verbal fun we are having. He does so by screaming at the top of his lungs that he hasn't had the chance to talk yet.
Me: What's up #2?
#2: Randy?
Me: Yes?
#2: Can I ask you a question?
Me: Yes?
#2: Randy?
Me: Yes?
#2: So, Randy...
Me: Yes?
#1: Did you know that the biggest Israeli tank...
#2: I WAS TALKING!!!! YOU INTERRUPTED ME!!!!
#1: I thought you were done!
#2: STOP TALKING!!! IT"S MY TURN!!!! IT"S MYYYYY TTTUUURRNNN!!!!!
Me: Okay, #2, it's your turn..talk to me.
#2: Randy?
Me: Yes?
#2: Randy
Me: Yes?
#2? Can I ask you a question?
Me: (frustrated as all hell) Okay, thats enough! Everybody quiet!
#3 joins the party
#3: Yeah, you heard him, everybody quiet!
#2: STOP PARENTING ME!!!!
#2: THIS ISN'T FAIR!! I DIDN'T GET TO TALK!!!
#3: Well now you're BOTH parenting me! You guys stop it!!!
#2: THIS ISN'T FAIR!! I DIDN'T GET TO TALK!!!
and on...
and on...
and on...
I think the biggest problem I have with the kids is how they make me feel about myself when it comes to my parenting skills. I try my hardest to be the best father/stepfather I know how to be but I still lose a lot of battles. Sometimes I am impatient, grouchy, intolerant, and downright just exhausted having to parent them.
I have even started reading an amazing book about hostage negotiation to try and help me navigate the parenthood waters better than I do now.
At the end of the day, I love them more than anything and I miss them after 24 hours of being away from them but even that doesn't stop me from silently flipping them off behind their back when they leave the room.
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